before we dance in hell, here’s a song…
ON SPORTS…sorta!
Post Boomer generation needs to wake up and read some logic. We’re the adults now, and so this is the guy that has basically bought Detroit. And Based on just his letters, I think Motown is heading for another post apocalypse. Objectively speaking, all emotion aside, because he doesn’t sound like a very good business man. Actually he sucks at his job. This is what he wrote when Lebron James left Cleveland four years ago.
“Some people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there.
Sorry, but that’s simply not how it works.
I PERSONALLY GUARANTEE THAT THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS WILL WIN AN NBA CHAMPIONSHIP BEFORE THE SELF-TITLED FORMER ‘KING’ WINS ONE. You can take it to the bank.”
On The New York Times article entitled The Post-Post-Apocalyptic Detroit
was going to say, more like post post post, but you know, postx2 is pretty damn post, especially when you’re using it in combination with apocalyptic.
“They’re like old-school sports cars,” said Dan Mullen, one of the executives who took over Quicken’s newly formed real estate arm. “These were buildings with so much character, so much history. They don’t exist anywhere else. And it was like, ‘Buy this parking garage, and we’ll throw in a skyscraper with it.”…regarding real It’s kinda interesting that the same dickhead who thinks he owns King James, also thinks he owns Detroit.estate in the D.
ON MORE THAN ONE HUMAN
we’re trying to run a society here. get your shit together.
ON GREAT DEAD WRITERS
I’m never too sure if I truly like Faulkner, but I do like the history of literature: “But this time, he wrote about pity: about something somewhere that made them all: the old man who had to catch the fish and then lose it, the fish that had to be caught and then lost, the sharks which had to rob the old man of his fish; made them all and loved them all and pitied them all. It’s all right.”
ON HIGHER LEARNING
I think I’m going to go back to college or something. get another degree in something that makes me more estranged from society.
ON SARAH PALIN SAYING NONSENSE
Justice is a slippery slope folks.
ON FLAVORED DRINKS
you know how people have those h2o flavor squirter things. I’m like what society, when I get my koolaid packet out and dump some in my milk jug of water.
ON BREAKFAST
getting some eggs at the market to cure the hangover, and this old lady said go ahead, I got all day, that is, unless it’s my time to go. Aint that the truth mam.
ON SUMMER
tucking in your t-shirt really gives you the kind of class and elegance that the un-tucked t-shirt really can’t compete with.STYLE
ON DUMB DUDE STUFF
so me and jw started a flight club. He knocked me in the jaw pretty good. his quote was, after I punched him in the ribs pretty good was, “What the fuck man, fight club is not fun.”
ON DIGITAL DATING
I can’t win #1 trying to get me a hot date on the ok cupid and this is the kind of message I get constantly: “You look like someone who got kidnapped”
yeah girl, cause I was raised by wolves.
ON GETTING LEGIT
Somebody asked if I wanted them to be my agent. I said those still exist? They said yeah and I said sure. The new agent then asked what the first order of business should be. I said get me cash anyway possible and we’ll go from there.
SWEET PICTURE BEFORE PUBLIC READING OF MY SWEET PROSE
Adventures In American Writing 