(No pictures, my words will have to do)
Alright and I’m tired. Been working long hours trying to get my books done because I need a couple of weeks to get my life in order. It’s not the easiest thing (for me) in the world to live your independent life and grow while you live and also be a writer and happy at the same time, but I’m trying and I just keep going, trying to be whoever the hell I am. So this is what’s happening, where the adventure should probably take me in the next couple weeks. A note to self? Probably…
So I’m working selling books and doing odd jobs and working making some blogs and power point presentations-raking leafs and yard work for other people, and some of them…well ha, they insist in paying me in beer, but I say, nope I need some money please, and then they give me money but don’t ask for help after that or even really friendship. Then they say “what about this”, and for some reason they don’t understand that content doesn’t come out of thin air and they actually have to do something after I set it up for them…Ha. Anyway, I’m really just taking care of business and looking out for myself and nothing really impresses me anymore, I just want to write my words and that’s about it, but I’m getting better at everything and learning to expect nothing out of anything what-so-ever. And this is just a note and I’m not editing the dang thing; I’m just trying to explain where my life and my words and my writing is going, and a note to self? Probably…
Couple weeks ago I felt myself growing, some kind of new aha moment, and I don’t know what it was or what it means, but I realized that maybe I’ve felt this way before but fell back into the ways I used to be, meaning that I could have grown into a better person and writer and humanitarian or whatever but I went back to what I knew out of fear. It’s scary growing because you don’t know what’s out there but you can either wither away and become the dark remains of the flower or you can go, you can go out there and try to figure out what you felt during those initial stages of that aha moment, that growth spurt, and if you don’t, you can regress back, and often that thought process is null-in void; you’re left back, waiting for the next time you might be ready to accept the reality of your life, and this, a note to self? Probably…
So I’m helping around with family and trying to cure my social anxiety by going to bed at an earlier time and not pressing myself so much because at night my creativity starts to slow down. I’m trying to think fast and slow at the same time, even if that means writing and editing slower, eating slower, making my bed slower. I mean I know where we’re all going to end up anyway, dead, and ha, still me, still dark, only a bit lighter.
In the next week I will have a new book to sell. The Portable Andrew H. Kuharevicz, and this will be a three hundred and fifty page collection of my four small collections, some notes and other thoughts not in print, and it will also contain the first part of my new Novella, of course called Sleep Walking Under The Moon Soul of Lake Michigan. There is about 600 words from the sections of it below in picture word format, and also a link to the PDF for those who don’t like the former media kind.
Sleep Walking Under The Moon Soul of Lake Michigan is a story and will be out as a solo book sometime by the end of this year or early January, these things take time, even more time than I wish, but it is what it is. Deal with it. And read, so what is that book about? It’s about learning how to be happy in dirt.
What”s the outlook for the future? First, well in 2013 I’ll be getting back to Adventures of a Dying Young Man and start writing something new, and this, a note to self? Probably…
Finally this new year will see a change for me. I’m still looking for jobs within the writing-journalism-publishing industry but still no calls, so with that said something came out of nowhere and it looks like I’m moving down to New Orleans a couple days after Christmas. I plan on only being there for the Winter, only a few months, but who knows. I do know I will return to Michigan, because why, I don’t know… because it’s my damn home and I like it here. On the other hand everything is kinda stagnant here-on hold and another thing I do know is that I have to move for a while and see something else, and mostly to prove to myself that I have matured since my last travels and that I wont fall into despair and into the vices and the drunken darkness that I know I could find down there if I was the person I used to be. Who knows. Keep your head up. And a note to self? probably….
And that’s about it. I’ll be posting a few more times in the next week, but after that I’m taking the rest of the year off from this blog so I can finish my work and gather my thoughts and plans and gain some momentum before I make my way down to New Orleans. And it doesn’t seem like much for most people, and I already have my home held for me, it’s just that I have to get there, and well, I don’t have a car, and really traveling is always a big ol’ mess I like to call an adventure. I don’t know why. I get lost easily, but once down there I plan on writing and watching and bringing my life jacket just in case. Keeping a distance from pretty much everything, just being there, working with my hands and helping out wherever I may be needed. Nobody needs my help in Michigan. Not yet anyway. Maybe I don’t know how to help yet. Who knows. I don’t.
So like I said, this was just an update, below are some words from my book, and man, why don’t I just start the sabbatical now? I need to, and alright so I will. Update: This will be the last post for Adventures in American Writing for 2012 (except for the announcement of my finished books). I’ve got life to move and my books to take care of. I’ll see you in 2013. It’s been a great year. Full with so many locations and ups and downs, but man, I really must say, that this has been one of the best years yet. Be cool.
Oh and consider buying my books. But if you do consider it…wait, for the new one, it’s going to be great. And all money will go to future releases and whatever else may come my way. Check out West Vine Press if you want to, or don’t. I’ll never do a kick starter, the only kick-start I need is that shock I receive every day I wake up older with back hurting trying to gather myself to get back to the keys. And so it goes….Thanks for reading.
See ya in New Orleans Louisiana.